Heartbreak.

I have never experienced such pain in my life before. Never. Words can't ever describe this feeling inside of me. Is there something worse than guilt? Shame? Regret? Sadness? Despair? Dread? I am feeling all these inside of me right now, it really hurts.

I have never done anything for them to be in this state before. I'm so fucking broken that I actually caused this and that I can't do ANYTHING about it. How can I make it right again? It's impossible.

I am not very eloquent with words and so it's difficult for me to express this adequately. This insane creature inside of me, eating me up from inside. All I can do to feel better is to harden my heart and let it be. But I just can't.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!